Archive for November, 2006

Nov 19 2006

I am so coordinated I should have been a gymnast.

Published by under Pets,Stupidity

Since Fate has refused to eat the expensive and specially bought allergy food that we have to feed Destiny, we’ve taken to feeding her a different kind of food at random times and places. Mostly, she gets fed in the bathroom or in the office. When I plan on being upstairs for a long stretch of time, I keep her food bowl on my printer shelf and just set it down for her to eat whenever she meows.

Last night I was done in the office, heading downstairs to read, so I decided to take her food with me so I could feed her in the bathroom. Somehow, I managed to injure myself while performing the simple act of picking up a bowl of cat food. I smacked the first knuckle of my index finger on the door jam. Hard. The scene went something like this:

Finger: CRASH!
Me: OUCH!
Bowl: THUNK!
Food: SCATTER!
Cats: SCATTER!
Me: OUCH!
The Man: Umm. . .
Chris: Hahahaha!
Me: OUCH!
Vacuum: VROOM!
Food: RATTLE!
Me: OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

At first, I thought I had broken the damn thing, because right after I hit it, I lost all feeling in it for awhile. I could tell that it hurt, but if I poked it, I got that deadened tingling feeling that to someone with my paranoia means “irreparable nerve damage”. Today my finger is bruised, slightly swollen, and feels as though I have a rubber band wrapped around the knuckle. Since I am right-handed, and the injured finger is the index finger of my right hand, you can imagine how fun this makes everyday activities like typing, smoking, and locking the deadbolt.

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Nov 19 2006

I miss the Friday Five, don’t you?

Published by under Snippets

I started looking at various sites that have journal writing prompts on them, because I have been in a major rut lately, with this whole no-writing thing. And I have come to the conclusion that most writing prompts are lame. Or, most of the sites seemed to be geared toward educators who are trying to get 9-13 year olds to write in their school journals.

I would like to write more, but I am casting about for topics. If anyone has any suggestions, or a question you’d like answered that I can make an entry out of, or just anything you’d like to see me write about, leave it in the comments.

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Nov 19 2006

More archives.

Published by under Computing

Okay, well, the November 2003 archives are up, as far as I can tell. I say “as far as I can tell” because there seems to be some fresh hell over here in journal land.

I use Blogger for my journal, which publishes to my own hosting account. A couple days ago I switched my journal over to the new Blogger in Beta they’ve got going on, because I didn’t KNOW it was still Beta. There was a message on my Blogger dashboard pretty much telling me that if I didn’t switch over to the new version then I was a luddite who stood in the way of all progress. So, I switched. And, since then, I’ve noticed a lot of weirdness when I publish. Things like. . . entries randomly vanishing from the index page. Or popping up where they don’t belong. For instance, the 11/19/03 entry that I added tonight not only showed up in the ’03 archives, but also in the November ’06 archives. I re-published six times, I cleared my cache, I deleted and re-published, and eventually I had to log into my hosting account and hand edit the hard file.

So, if you notice any strangeness (like an entry about me at work, when you know that I currently am not employed), feel free to drop me a line and let me know.

Also, just a reminder that the comments from the older entries were not ported over, so if there is something in an old entry that refers to comments where there are none, that’s why.

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Nov 17 2006

Duck! Incoming Friday Five.

Published by under Survey/Friday Five

ZOMG!!!!1!! The return of the Friday Five!
Actually, I don’t know if I’ll do this as regularly as I used to, because the original Friday Five site is shut down, and all the new ones seem to have poopy questions. But, I would really like to start writing a bit more in here, and this is an easy (if mindless) place to begin.

1. Do you have a hurricane or tornado story?
Well, I live in fear of tornadoes (most of my friends are either sagely nodding their heads or sarcastically saying “Oh no shit? Gee, I never noticed.”). Ever since I’ve moved in with The Man, and therefore live in a place that I am somewhat responsible for, I’ve been convinced that we are going to be destroyed by a tornado every single season, and we will be one of those people you see on Red Cross commercials. I’ll be the one sobbing into my teddy bear. (um, not to make fun of people who need the Red Cross. I’m feeling you.) Anyway, for all my fear, I’ve only been in ONE actual tornado, and that was when I was very young. My dad and I were the only ones home, and he had to go outside to catch our goats because they were flying away. Really. See, if it had been me, and I was the adult in that situation, it would have been “Screw the goats, everyone to the basement!”, but my dad saved the livestock and this allowed my family to rebuild our run-down ranch and eventually escape the punishing dust-bowl atmosphere of mid-Michigan in the early 80′s. Um. . . or maybe the goats just didn’t die. Either way.

2. When was the last time you flew a kite?
When I was a wee shaver. This is one of the few snippets of memory I retain from the time when my original nuclear family all lived under one roof. I don’t know why, it’s not like I had a life-altering kite experience, I just remember trying to fly this kite, and not doing very well, and getting pissed off that it wouldn’t stay up. I persevered and flew the kite, though. I had a MASK kite. Not “Mask”, as in the movie about the poor kid with the unfortunate disease, but MASK as in “Mobile Armored Strike Kommand”, the 80s cartoon.

3. Not counting in the midst of a storm, where’s the windiest place you’ve been?
It’s a toss up between on a ferry to Mackinaw Island, or in the backseat of my stepdad’s Camaro when he had the T-tops off. And if you know my stepdad, you are right now wondering how he fit into a Camaro, let alone how there was enough room for me in the back. Let me just say that A. he hit his head on the ceiling a lot and had to have the seat ALL the way back, not to mention it was a contortionist act getting in and out; and B. I sat sideways in the backseat.

4. Where did you last see a real windmill?
There’s one on my property, but it doesn’t have the blades anymore. So it’s real and unreal at the same time. Cosmic.

5. From which direction is the wind coming right now?
Well, since I don’t live in a yurt, I can’t tell you that. I’m inside a pretty solid brick farmhouse. I can tell you that the wind is not strong enough from any direction to generate weather systems inside the house. We have pretty old windows, and they aren’t sealed. So, when we get a strong nor’easter (or nor’wester or sou’wester or any kind of strong wind at all) the shades in the office flap in the breeze.

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Nov 17 2006

Look who’s got a Farrah ‘do.

Published by under Holiday Magic,Outdoors

Today I started my Christmas shopping. Not because I am all forward-thinking and prepared, but more because it was a Thursday in November, pre-Thanksgiving, and I knew there would be few people out and about in the mall.

I didn’t know that it would be snowing.

The snow had very little effect on my shopping. The roads weren’t nasty at all because it’s not really cold enough to freeze and make everything icy. But the snowflakes – good Lord. They weren’t even FLAKES, they were snow gobs, and they fell from the sky and landed on me with an almost audible thud. It was as though someone had torn open an enormous teddy bear and was disemboweling it all over the tri-city area. Because it’s not that cold, instead of collecting on the ground, the snow turned to slush, which made everything much less pretty.

I came ill-prepared for snow in many ways: no gloves, no snow-brush in the car, heeled boots. But the worst thing was that my hair was down, curled, and hair-sprayed. I had to hood myself up so that my hair wouldn’t solidify into one sticky mass of gross.

Anyway, I got shopping done for the brothers-in-law and the small rugrats that are our nieces and nephews. I also bought new ornaments for the tree, because I am tired of the purple/silver/gold theme we’ve had for the last however many years. The Man says our tree looks like an old-person tree, by which I guess he means there’s a theme, and the ornaments match, and we don’t have specialty Budweiser holiday things hanging off of it. Or anything made out of tinfoil. I’m trying to make an old-timey tree for my next round, and to start it all off I got some of these ornaments from Target:

I got four boxes of minis (part of a box is what is pictured above) and two boxes of larger ones in the same style. I have to say, though, that Target has some of the most preposterous tree decorations ever. I saw a bunch that were peacocks, and I could only imagine that they were trying to cater to the Retired Vegas Showgirl market. Peacocks? On your Christmas tree? Fer real?Anyway, that was my day. Christmas shopping. It was slushy, but there weren’t many people out, for which I will give thanks next Thursday, on the sanctioned Day For Giving Thanks. Before I go, wanna see something funny? I bet you didn’t know that I used to be on Charlie’s Angels. I have got to get my curling iron under control:


“Hi, Charlie!”

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