Feb 23 2011

One of these things is not for shaving.

Published by at 1:50 pm under Beauty,Rants,The Man

Since The Man has started shaving with a straight razor, I have become sort of familiar with the different little props that guys get to assist in the Big Shaving Routine. When he was shaving with a regular old Mach 3 safety razor, his shaving supplies consisted of razor, shaving cream, aftershave. But NOW, oh NOW, we have:

  1. Two straight razors.
  2. A set of “hones” for sharpening.
  3. A strop. (The strop hangs in our bathroom and has inspired several tentative questions into what exactly we get up to in the bathroom. I guess people see a long, wide, leather strap and their minds go right to The Bad Place)
  4. Copious amounts of shaving soap.
  5. A brush.
  6. A scuttle.
  7. After shave balm mixed up by Dr. Mom.

He really likes his new shaving routine. He thinks it’s interesting. I like it, too, because now I have an excuse to go to antique stores and look for things like straight razors and shaving scuttles and stuff. And this brings me to the point of this post.

ATTENTION SELLERS: MUSTACHE CUPS ARE NOT FOR SHAVING.

I don’t know how many times I’ve seen a mustache cup listed online or in a store as a “shaving mug”. The first time, I didn’t know any better, and I was left puzzling as to how a round cake of shaving soap was supposed to fit on that little half-shelf that mustache cups have. For those of you who are lost, here is a mustache cup:

Mustache cup.

It has a little shelf, so that a gentleman with a grand mustache can drink his tasty beverage without getting his fine facial hair soaked in tea or coffee or whatever.  The little shelf holds his ‘stache out of the drink, and everyone is happy. But it is not a shaving mug. I can see how it could be confusing, because it kind of has a shaving scuttle set up. You see, in a shaving scuttle, there is a shelf for the soap to sit on. Warm water goes into the resevoir underneath, to heat the lather and to dip your brush in. It looks like this:

Scuttle MugSee how the shelf is a whole circle? That’s because cakes of shaving soap are ROUND. They come in ROUND SHAPES. Not in little half moon shapes.

What’s even more annoying is when the vendor knows that a mustache cup is not supposed to be used for shaving, but in the product description says “this mug was used to keep a man’s mustache out of the drink but I think it would be great for shaving too kthxbai”. Because that is STUPID. Some girl whose boyfriend or husband or father uses shaving soap is going to see that and go “Oh, OK, I’ll get that for Bob”. And poor Bob is going to open that up and be like “WTF?” Because how many guys are willing to take a piece of soap and a knife and whittle their shaving soap into the proper shape to fit onto that little shelf?

Do not be fooled by vendors who don’t know their business or who are trying to fleece you into buying something that will not work. Mustache cups are not for shaving. They are for mustaches.

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